Husband Wants Baby, but “It’s Up to My Wife”
Annika and her husband came into Care Net of Puget Sound looking for an ultrasound. They knew they were pregnant, but not sure how far along the pregnancy was. As soon as Care Net’s Client Advocate started asking Annika the intake questions, she interrupted and said, “We are not sure what we are going to do; we want an abortion.” The couple had a young son at home and felt they were not ready for another baby. The Client Advocate explained that they don’t perform or refer for abortions but could provide information to help in their decision.
Annika asked specifically about medical abortion. The Nurse Sonographer replied, “I am happy to go through that with you, but I suggest you listen to the options first and we can explain things. Women have a right to know about the abortion procedures, the risks and the options available before they make their decision.”
Our Client Advocate then turned to Annika’s husband and asked, “What are you thinking?” He said, “I want the baby, but it’s not my decision. It’s up to my wife and I will support her in whatever she decides.” The Client Advocate continued with the intake protocol, trying to determine why his wife wanted to abort.
Annika didn’t provide a lot of information on why. She was curious about how the medical abortion procedure worked. The Nurse Sonographer serving on the mobile unit explained the limited obstetric ultrasound, why it was important for a woman to have all the information she needed—not only about the procedures and the risks involved, but what’s going on inside of her body so she could make the best decision for her. Annika decided to go forward with the ultrasound. Annika was fairly early in her pregnancy; but they were able to find the baby’s heartbeat, and she was amazed.
The Nurse Sonographer printed out an ultrasound picture for the couple and asked if they wanted it. It was Annika that reached out for the picture.
The nurse answered her questions about medical abortion and gave the couple a brochure that explained the procedures, and the risks involved.
Annika also learned that there are potential emotional side effects after an abortion. Our Nurse Sonographer let her know some women really struggle with their decision to end their pregnancies. The staff on the mobile shared about our abortion recovery program; making sure she was aware of this support group, if she decided to end her pregnancy and was still struggling.
As they were getting ready to leave, the client advocate asked if she could pray for them. They said yes, and as she asked Annika what she wanted prayer for, Annika started to cry.
“Please pray for me, I just don’t know what I want to do.” As they prayed together, Annika cried quietly, and her husband put his arm around her and pulled her in tight. They thanked everyone for all their help and left.
The next day Annika’s advocate reached out via text to see how she was doing. The message that came back was the best news ever, “Thank you so much, we decided to keep our baby!”